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Posted by Dave Wood on February 22, 2001 at 02:28:35:

A collection of ’expert’ comments by customers at a shop’s record department

- Last summer I was visiting the Bahamas with my daughter – she’s a doctor by the way – and there was a local musician in a night club who had white shorts and played saxophone with his toes, so do you have any of his records.
- A costumer is holding an empty cassette in his hand and asks: - Is this cassette the kind that is loud enough?
- Have you got that cassette, that Beethoven’s 9th sinfony, the Four Seasons?
- Could I have Albinoni’s Adagio? It’s been composed by Bach.
- Could I have Ravioli’s Bolero?
- This cassette is broken! I play the first side, wind it to the beginning and turn it around and then the record player pops the cassette out!
- Oh, have you got that so wonderful christmas song, that I heard from the radio this morning at 6 o’clock? I don’t know the name but you must know it! I have to know if the meat is good as I’m a butcher…
- Is this record single or stereo?
- Have you got Listz’s composed Verdi’s Rigoletto for piano?
- There should be a record for me! – Under who’s name? – Mine!
- Is there any Paganini’s solo violin recordings played by the master himself? (P. died 1840)
- Customer on the phone: - Have you got Mozzarella? – Do you maybe mean the old Italian pop tune Lazzarella? – What!? Isn’t this at the cheese department?
- Could I listen to this Beethoven’s record, to hear if it’s classical or not?
- Do you have the Vivaldi’s Seven seasons?

Again this wasn't really bass stuff but lots of fun.
All of these have actually been said and they are true.

Dave Wood

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